Jury Duty

There are a few things in life people dread, like a bikini wax, a trip to the dentist and a Jury Summons. So when I received my Jury Summons in the mail all I could do was hope for a really high number to avoid being called altogether…Dang 49!

So I showed up to the Civic Center as bright eyed and bushy tailed as I possibly could for a Monday morning.

We were herded like cattle into a large room that looked like a cafeteria. There is a large desk in the center and aisles of tables and chairs on either side. One by one we all sign in and take a seat.

I feel like I'm in grade school again, waiting to be picked for a team in my gym class.The hours pass and this is all getting to be a huge test of my patience!

We cattle are now being led into the courtroom for questioning to see which one of us will be chosen and sent off to slaughter.

They start with the Judge asking everyone a few simple questions followed by the District Attorney and then the Defense Attorney.

As the Defense Attorney is questioning us it is slowly dawning on me that I could get picked and must do something to stand out as an unworthy candidate or I face being stuck here all week listening to this boreing dribble!

So the Defense Attorney asks everyone "If anyone here would have a problem with following the judge's orders and finding the defendant innocent till proven guilty?"

I raise my hand….and am the only one to do so too!

"Yes Ma'am….you would have a problem with this? Why?"

"Well he didn't get here by a lottery like we did- he had to have done something!!"

A small gasp followed by a few chuckles are herd from everyone in the courtroom, except of course the defense Attorney who looks less then amused. A few people nod their heads in agreement; even the Judge had a slight smile on his face like he was trying to hold back a chuckle!

"Ok….could you explain?" He asks

"Well I dated a Federal Agent for 6 years and I know they just don't hand out arrest warrants"

"Well we aren't dealing with any Fed's here in this case."

"Doesn't matter! It's all Law Enforcement!"

Again a slight chuckle in agreement with my statement.

Well, that outa do it I think!We are excused into the hall so the lawyers can convene and as we exit the courtroom people comment as they pass me and say "That was a good one!! Your SO done!haha"

Needless to say they were right, that statement disqualified me and I was not picked. Like I said, it didn't sound like a very interesting case anyway!...maybe next time….in another 6 years!